Here I’ll collect queer words and phrases I use so you can look them up :3
AGAB
AGAB: Assigned Gender At Birth.
AMAB: Assigned Male At Birth.
AFAB: Assigned Female At Birth.
Basically, which gender did your doctor guess, and assign to you, at birth, with no consultation with you?
Bisexual
Back in archaic times, when people thought there were 2 genders, no more no less, there were heterosexual, homosexual, and bisexual, where bisexual was both at once.
As society evolved and the complexity of gender started being explored for real, things weren’t so simple anymore. Bisexual, which previously only meant “2”, hence the “bi-“ prefix in the word, had to either become an exclusive term, or the definition had to evolve past its component parts. And so, the word evolved alongside society, and the more modern definition is “Someone who’s attracted to 2 OR MORE genders”.
See also: pansexual.
Cisgender
Cisgender, cis for short, is being non-transgender, as in, the doctor managed to guess right when you plopped out.
Yup, it’s a [insert your AGAB here] Your Doctor
That’s right! You
See also transgender
Cracking
Cracking, a term used by some trans people when they first discover they’re trans. A common way to start to crack is by taking the button test
See also egg
Deadname
A name previously used by transfolk, the “dead” part, at least for me, refers to the death of the “mask” I was wearing while using my own deadname.
Gender Dysphoria
The agonizing feeling trans people can get when you realize that there are aspects, commonly seen as gendered, about you that doesn’t match your gender, but instead, signals your AGAB
Egg
A trans person before they realize they’re trans. Sometimes used to refer to people in the present, which, unless this person has self identified as an egg, is wrong. A person can never be assigned egg status. They can only ever have been an egg, or someone who self identifies, at which point, use their definition of the word as it applies to them. Discovering you’re trans and hence recognizing your (now previous) egg status is known as cracking.
Hormone Replacement Therapy
Hormone Replacement Therapy, specifically, Transgender Hormone Replacement Therapy, is when you replace the dominant sex hormone in your body with the other one. For instance, estrogen for transfeminine people, and testosterone for transmasculine people.
Non Binary
Non binary, sometimes enby, is someone who doesn’t fall into the two binary blocks of gender. Either being not fully man, not fully woman, both, neither something completely different, or sliding around the spectrum over time.
Incomprehensive list of non-binary identities, but the most common ones are:
| Name | Description |
|---|---|
| Agender | Neither man nor woman |
| Bigender | Two (or more) genders at once. Not necessarily the binary genders, but can be, say, man and demigirl, agender and demiboy etc. |
| Genderfluid | Gender is fluid and changes over time, sometimes when it happens rapidly someone may choose genderflux to emphasize the rapid changes. |
| Demiboy | Leaning towards man, but not a binary man. |
| Demigirl | Leaning towards woman, but not a binary woman. |
Also, don’t take my words as gospel. This vocab is meant as a rough overview and not a nuanced and detailed description of each. There are nuances to each, and this is neither the place nor do I have the experience and knowledge to get into super detail of each.
Pansexual
Pansexual, the sexuality that doesn’t care about gender, Or attracted to all genders. Or when people wanna distance themselves from the binary roots of the word bisexual.
What’s the difference between pansexual and bisexual? Nuance. Not agreed upon nuance. Ask 3 people and you get 5 answers and one person who jumps out a window to avoid the question. I’m not even gonna try to nail down the difference here, because I’m most certainly not gonna be comprehensive enough, and someone will get angry. Sorry.
Passing
Passing or cis-passing, is when someone “passes” for a cis person. That is, the person is assumed to be their gender, without being “obviously trans”, and therefore also assumed cis, because cis is the norm. Only really applicable to binary trans, or at least binary-ish trans people, but some non-binary people call “visible confusion from other people as to what pronouns/gender they are” as passing.
Personal opinion:
Passing is a harmful concept which stems from that being seen as trans is something negative. It’s an outside cisnormative world imposing these expectations on us when this is not achievable, nor should decide the validity of, every single person.
Personal desire:
I want to pass. I’m not immune to societal pressure.
Polyamory
Polyamory is the concept that love is not necessarily between just 2 people. You can love, and have multiple romantical (and sexual) partners. This differs from open relationships in that open relationships often simply focuses on having sex, whereas polyamory is about love, romance, and/or queerplatonic partnerships.
Polycule
Polycule is a tongue in cheek way of referring to the network of people that tends to appear when polyamorous people have multiple relationships. The name is a spin on “molecule”, due to the fact that diagrams of molecules tend to have a similar style to the diagrams of polycules when drawn up as a diagram.
Queerplatonic partnership
Queerplatonic partnership, or QPP, is a concept where you recognize a person as… not “just” friends, but more, but it does not necessarily fall into the societal framework of a sexual/romantic relationship. It’s what bridges the gap between “friends” and “partners”
TERF
TERF:
Trans
Exclusionary
Radical
Feminist
So-called “feminists” who think trans-women are men in dresses wanting to assault people in bathrooms. And that trans men are “lost sisters” or butch lesbians or some other bullshit.
Point is, they’re at best misinformed, and at worst just outright hateful.
PS. “Feminists” in quotes because they’re not feminists, they’re people trying to throw other people under the bus while waving the label of feminism to justify their actions.
Transfeminine
Transfeminine, or transfem, is someone who’s, in some form or another, is transitioning towards more femininity than where they got assigned at birth.
It doesn’t mean they’re binary, but it does mean they consider their gender identity to be more feminine than the assigned male one they got at birth.
Sometimes they transition socially, sometimes medically, sometimes it’s just something they dare doing in private, with their secret wardrobe, or should I say, closet.
Sometimes they do all of the above. Sometimes they’re non binary, sometimes they’re binary women.
See also: transmasculine
Transgender
Transgender, trans for short. Someone whose doctor guessed wrong when they plopped out.
Yup, it’s a [insert your AGAB here] Your Doctor
That’s wrong! You
To quote John Oliver
Transgender people have a gender identity that differs from the one they were assigned at birth. And that gender identity is not the same as sexual orientation. Gender identity is who you are, sexual orientation is who you love. Some transgender people do undergo hormone therapy or sex reassignment surgery as part of their transition, some do not. And interestingly their decision on this matter is medically speaking, none of your fucking business!
John Oliver, Transgender Rights: Last Week Tonight
See also cisgender
Transmasculine
Transmasculine, or transmasc, is someone who’s, in some form or another, is transitioning towards more masculinity than where they got assigned at birth.
It doesn’t mean they’re binary, but it does mean they consider their gender identity to be more masculine than the assigned female one they got at birth.
Sometimes they transition socially, sometimes medically, sometimes it’s just something they dare doing in private, with their secret wardrobe, or should I say, closet.
Sometimes they do all of the above. Sometimes they’re non binary, sometimes they’re binary men.
See also: transfeminine